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Is adoption another solution?

Updated: Dec 16, 2021

Adoption is the social, emotional, and legal process in which children who will not be raised by their birth parents become full and permanent legal members of another family while maintaining genetic and psychological connections to their birth family.

There may be so many circumstances under which a child can be left alone. The reason could be anything under the sun like the birth parents are unable to raise the child, the death of the birth parents, single parent, unexpected pregnancy, birth parents having gender conflicts (not wanting a female child), financially not stable, specially-abled child, etc...

Though there are organizations that take care of the abandoned child, it becomes very difficult to accommodate the child’s needs as they grow, and given the current population, this count is nowhere to be decreasing. Society is slowly changing and people are making conscious decisions whether to birth a child or not. But, the percentage of people who consciously think about this is very less compared to people wanting to birth a child due to societal pressure.

Thankfully there are organizations, fundraisers to cater to the needs of the child to some extent, but it is not enough with the current rate of the rowing population. The mouths to feed are too many than the available supply. If adoption is normalized, if the process is made simpler then there might be so many changes in the society, people might even start thinking of adopting a child as another option instead of birthing a child, rather than thinking about it as a hassle. Many people who want to adopt a child but take a step back are mainly due to family and societal pressure. They may have to answer so many unwanted, unreasonable questions from people around them, making it even more difficult to have the thought of adopting.

How to adopt a child?

There are various ways by which you can help a child. Some people choose to adopt the child and nurture them as their own, some people choose to fund the child’s education, some people choose to take care of the finances of the child’s needs, there are options to fund for the medical treatments if there are any and many more options. You can search the CARA website for legal details on the adoption process.

Things to remember when you decide to adopt -

  • The child might have already faced trauma in their life, too early to understand how to cope up with it. The child might have strong and deep emotions attached to it and care must be taken on handling these emotions.

  • There will be emotional changes in accepting the new family especially if the child is a toddler or above that.

  • You have to prepare yourself and your immediate family members for adoption.

  • If you already have a child of your own, and you want to adopt a second child, then you must take the consent of your child as well and see that she/he is okay with the decision. Do not surprise them with your decisions.

  • Talk to parents who have adopted and how they handled the situations. Even today, the adoption process is not that easy but with the right approach, things tend to get smoother.

  • Visit the child and try to create a bond before you bring them to your home.

  • Join adoption groups where parents share their journey and experiences.

  • Discuss with your partner and choose what type of adoption process you want to opt for.

  • Though it may sound all complex and difficult, it may turn out happy and pleasant. You might even thank yourself for doing such a noble thing.

  • Be ready to accept the changes.

  • Most important of all, you have to be open to the adopted child and let them know how the adoption works, and be open to their feelings and response. Let them know how to be confident and they are no different from other children.

So, is adoption another solution to extend your family?

Yes, it can be a solution for people who do not want their body to go through a hell lot of medications and tests to set up a fertile egg and again go through medications throughout pregnancy to keep the baby safe inside the womb and once the baby is safely out, forget about the postpartum care the woman needs who went through this strenuous journey and is struggling with all the side effects of the medication both physically and emotionally.

One must know that not every couple is ready to be parents, nor do they want to parent a child, that is completely okay as long as one is clear as to what they want. When there is a child, whether biological or adopted, there are emotions involved, there is an added responsibility and one has to accept those responsibilities. If you are not ready for the added responsibilities then you have to think twice before you decide to either birth a child or adopt a child. Here “you” refers to the couple and not a particular individual. Think, discuss and accept the decisions you make.

“To go through life effortlessly, children need an atmosphere that nurtures their inner strength”

If you think you are ready for it, then go for it…


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